Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops