A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

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My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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