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What is better than life? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

will you like this joke my sources say no

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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