What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

thumb_up thumb_down -11

AND

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Suck pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hi hey i hate you why you ate my mother she tasted good i like fried chicken ITS A SMALL WORLD! SO DO I well lets go to the beach ok

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops