A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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it was 3 am in the morning and i was stopped by 2 black men in an alley. we said hey to eachother and went along

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops