A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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