If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Haha, I get it..

There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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