Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Haha, I get it..

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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