what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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your mama's so fat... that's it

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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