An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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