why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops