What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

Justin Bieber

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

Im about to rewrite History....... History

ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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