If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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bite me

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Obama = ebola

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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