Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops