a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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What is cowboy say

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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hi jonny

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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