A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

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A blode walks into a bar, She gets her hair dyed brown and is later presumed smarter due to a the genral public being steriotipical.

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. Imams do not drink alcohol so this joke has a logical flaw.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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