To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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What's the difference between an American and a Russian? One's American and one's Russian.

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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