What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it slipped from his hand.

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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A moose walks into a store, walking up to an employee he says "Where are the potatoes?" The employee replies "Isle 5." The moose thanks the employee and heads off to find Isle 5. Upon reaching isle 5- he finds no potatoes.

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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