How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Obama lin Baden.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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