What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

Your mom is so old she died

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...