What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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rent a cops

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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A guy walks into a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops