Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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a man was shot.... he died

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

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Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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