What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

This isn't funny.

are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

an american walks out of a strip club.

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

A bar walks into a man

George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...