Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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Unfortually last night Andrew McNeil was studying soo hard that his head exploded and the next day at school, his friends found out and then cheered with laughter and happieness.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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Finally, lets take the fight two the streets shall we, no I am not asking, asking is for pussies: YOU VIOLATED AND KILLED MY FATHER! YES YES WHAT IS IT WITH YOU WOMEN ANYWAYS I VIOLATED YOUR MOTHER TOO, BUT YOU DON`T HEAR HER WHINING ABOUT IT! In fact tell her to stop her sending me nude shots, I prefer it when she sends me those she takes of you in your sleep... Your friendly Neighborhood R*pist Moral Man:The day Moral Man graced your village was the worst day of your life, for me it was fathers day! Literally, do you really think I killed your father? I would never comitt suicide! Now, let us celebrate our reunion with some... "Moral WINcest" Barlog: Yes we would like to see the tapes you made for me banging her mother. two Super Turbo edition hours later: YEEEEEEEEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops