Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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HOLY COW!

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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What's worse than getting a F on your History test? The millions of children around your age that cannot even afford to go to school, most likely because they live in a third world country.

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

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42

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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