A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

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Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

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What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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A women in the kitchen.

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What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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