Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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what does the sloth say to Jonah reincastle? nothing Jonah is the sloth

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Haha, I get it..

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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