Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

Q.How do you kill a Zombie? A. You can't Zombies are fictional monsters that do not exist in our reality. instead why not focus on killing other things such as, Terrorists, Ants and People who piss you off

There was a little boy (Jewish edition) Saten: Look father, my silk vestments make me look so much more fabulous than you! Gad: Oh! Hawt sweetie! But not as pretty as my dress... Err I mean "silks"... Anyway you are no longer my son! Which means we can do you know what ;) Saten: Hmpf! I am feel disappoint in of your dress! Gad: ITS SILKS! just *basically* a dress... Oh my gawd! You refuse to give it to your "daddy" ;) You are losar ant not gonna get to hang around this club anymore! Saten: OMFG you are so enrage! You are liek not classy or flamboyant at all anymore, sorry pimp "daddy" :/ Imma leavin! And btw Adam my secret lover has such a bigger wienersnitzel anyways, and he is totally eating my fruits if you know what I mean ;) Gad: Oh me so jelez I am completelay going to panish him! I am throwing him out of Paradise and he will only be abley to get children with women now, lulz I am liek so evel. Saten: OMG WEMEN! UR LIEK ZO EVEL! What u goin to do next huh? Forbid Sodomy? Omg tat would be so mean :(... Moral: "NEVER WEAR A FINER SILKS THAN GAD!"...Well, it starts with two flamboyant faggots fighting over who has the "prettiest silk vestments" (basically dresses)... The rest kinda kinda figures.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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