How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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