What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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no

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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I C U P White stuff

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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