hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

do you know what was a good idea? not last night

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

jews

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

thumb_up thumb_down -22

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Maths.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How about that airline food?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops