What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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What happens when you run out of butter You ask antonio

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What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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Ol-ive

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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Women's rights.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Im gay What about you

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What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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