A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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read this sentence again.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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