DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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What's red and checkered and tells you to turn your music down? Michael

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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