Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

A woman walks into a bar.

You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

A man walks down the street past a flamboyant homosexual male and kills him in a hate crime. This homosexual was Dylan Glogowski

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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