One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...