Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

Bryson got a concussion...he died

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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