Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

school homewrok

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Ehh

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Dick Cheney That's the joke

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops