Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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