Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops