Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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