What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall: "Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!! by darragh hamilton

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops