See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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