whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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