knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

A man walks down the street past a flamboyant homosexual male and kills him in a hate crime. This homosexual was Dylan Glogowski

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

What's black, then white, then dead all over? Michael Jackson

Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

That is a bad anti-joke down there | V

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

if you have two gay people, would their kid be gay too? oh wait....

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

A black person dies.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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