Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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The global news

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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