Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

class is canceled. My professor died.

-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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