- Anti Joke

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What is worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

You had better thumbs up this post.

Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.