- Anti Joke

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF 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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Neither have I

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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