What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

I rated up my joke then opened a new tab went to Anti-Jokes.com and rated it again. Problem antijokes?

Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

add me on facebook guys , im sexy , i get mad girls and guys, im bisexual , and im a blood (the gang) http://www.facebook.com/brock.beatty.1?ref=ts

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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