roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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What kind of coffee did they drink on the Titanic? They didn't. They all died.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Herpes. Bummer.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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Boob

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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