Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

Do the roar!

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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