Hey man. what? squidbillies.

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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