Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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mmm i love marble bumhole

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: A bush, have you ever been dragged through one? It hurts.

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

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Honk if you're Amish!

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops